One White Horse Standing

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One White Horse Standing Newsletter

APRIL 2008

Spring is coming, at least that is what I keep saying to myself. The 2-3 feet of snow from the 2nd week of March is melting, the birds are singing the sun up every morning, and trees are beginning to bud. So I am holding out that Spring will arrive as a vibrant burst of life soon.

In this newsletter, I will include some information on Kyanite, one of the few stones that never needs cleared or cleansed and that can open and align the chakras. In addition, I am going to share my personal experiences of working with myself and others that go too far into the ethers and have trouble coming home to their bodies. The recent surge of people contacting me about this type of situation warrants some conversation of what to do when you or a person gets so ungrounded that it is difficult to reach behind you and find your butt.

Remember, if you have questions or something to share, get them to me and we will try to include them in the next newsletter.

Bountiful Blessings

Herb Stevenson
One White Horse Standing

PS: Cougar medicine starts at 9:00 AM on Friday, April 25th. Those coming in the night before, we will have a circle around the fire to share stories and ask questions.


My Story

About 15 years ago, I was constantly experimenting with high energy stones, such as phenacite, azezulite, moldavite, danburite, tanzanite, seraphinite, etc. along with the Atlantean use of quartz crystals to create grids that basically enabled me to launch my conscious awareness deep into the ethers. I soared around Venus, dove deep into the center of the earth, merged with moldavite, and suddenly became highly inflated about being powerful, near omnipotent, and unable to listen to reason. For example, after merging with Moldavite in a deep journey, I wrote the poem below in 1994. I cannot express the exhilaration I felt from the experience, except to say that I had a tendency to think I had discovered something unbelievable.

As I continued to explore the different worlds, one day, I found a tunnel to the light. It led to a poem about the darkness in the tunnel, the lost souls not able to move toward the light. Traditional church spirituality would say that I went too far to the other side and that those in the tunnel would follow me back into this world; what in shamanic terms we call attachments. Synergistically, a movie with Elizabeth Montgomery from the TV series Bewitched was on TV that night and it was about the lead character having a near death experience and having a horrifying experience of a dark spirit trying to get her soul to return to the tunnel. Besides bringing a few hairs up on my neck while I watched, I wondered if I had gotten myself into a problem. After quickly blowing-off the movie as “does not apply to me”, I found that I was spending more time in the other world, so much so that I preferred the other world.

One day, I realized that I could float out of my body without trying and being grounded became near impossible. I began to have bleed-through experiences, medically, called hypnogogic experiences, such as the walls melting and a golden owl coming out of the walls and stating that all of the hidden secrets must now be revealed. I realized that the veil between the two was so thin that I could not keep myself fully present and in my body. To say the least, I was terrified. What had been fun and exciting, and an ego-booster was now a 24/7 nightmare. I watched a stone man come out of the large herkimer that I kept near my desk and wondered if I would ever feel safe again.

During this time, I had the sense that I kept being called to “come back” to a place that was fun and now felt like a manipulation of some spiritual being far stronger than I feared that I might be. I remembered a story by Michael Harner about his first experience in an indigenous village. As he walked into the village, after a 20 mile hike through the heavy foliage, he saw a man being belligerent with a tree. Michael pointed at the man and asked if that was the shaman. His translator sternly responded, “No, a crazy person. He never came back from the other world.”

I realized that the best I could do to cope was get into therapy and stop all use of high energy stones. Therapy supported me to understand how close I had come to a psychotic break— some call a spiritual psychosis; however, suddenly, I realized that I needed to know more about grounding and grounding stones. For the next three or four years, I carried 4 golf ball sized rocks in each of my boots; e.g. hematite, galena, pyrite, etc.. I carried so many stones in my pants pockets that the material would tear and the rocks would roll down my legs and into my boots. Literally, I was a walking gravel pit or a rock garden depending on your perspective.

Supporting Others

Over the last ten years, people from Dominca, an island off the coast of the Dominican Republic, Israel, and from around the country have contacted me about the same type of experience. A few knew me, most found my website and had a sense that I understood. Many talked of a sudden sense of being controlled by an entity, a deep sense of something that had been ecstatic had suddenly gone awry and all of them had been deeply involved in some form of spiritual practice, whether it was meditation, shamanic journeys, etc.. In two of the situations, the individual was not willing to let go of the ecstatic experiences and the exciting psychic powers. Nothing was pursued, because denial is the hardest part of the problem. The entity or energy is in command just like a narcotic drug. Later, some people have contacted me when terror over-came them about staying on this plane, then the work began. Over the last ten years, I started tracking what to do when faced with these types of situations. I used a mixed method of a partnership between shamanic and western medicine.

Some Guiding Ideas

Throughout the following process, I follow my instinct about when to do a shamanic journey. Typical shamanic work would suggest to simply do an extraction. However, in these cases, an extraction is not the biggest issue. It is often getting the person to want to live in their body. Moreover, the work is often the following stages:

  1. The person indicates that something is not quite right and they are having trouble staying in their body. Often, there is a sense of being pulled from the body, and they might add that they sense something is attached or trying to control them. At this point, I start with trying to get a sense of the energy and simply listen to the person. I suggest grounding stones and if not an emergency for them to consider getting therapeutic support to address potential anxiety and panic attacks. All high energy stones including quartz are to be removed from the premises. Grounding stones can be put in the four corners of the house, each room, the bed as felt and deemed necessary by the person. Throughout, the focus is on encouraging the person to empower themselves through determination, focus and, if need be, to get angry. All of these require staying present.

  2. If there is a lot of resistance to suggestions, the individual may sense something is “not quite right” and yet lingers in attachment to the energies and the commands of the entity or spiritual psychosis. At this point, the person cannot tell a difference between the voice of their self and that of the addictive energies. There is nothing that can be done, as the person may not be able to hear you. I suggest more firmly that they should get therapeutic support and realize that until their world starts to disintegrate, often experienced like a spiritual psychosis where their very existence is threatened, they will not likely move towards getting support.

  3. Sometimes, I provoke the person by noting their addiction to the energy or the entity depending on how they relate to what is happening. Generally, there will be a realization of being in over their head or an enormous push back, often a wave of rage and judgmental attacks about my competency and character; so, do not use this technique if afraid of provocation and conflict. The basis of the nudge is to see where the person sits. Often, I will be told how they are a person of the light, that they are visited by spiritual persons, whether it is Kwan-yin, Jesus, Buddha, etc. and when I nudge them, all light is lost. They become lost and afraid or obsessive, insulting, attacking as in “I am of the light and you are of the dark or are evil”, belligerent, defensive, and/or dismissive as in “I do not need your support”.
    Since important spiritual beings often show-up during these situations and influence our perceptions of what is happening, it is important to remember our part of the process. For example, a friend was at a Sundance where one of the ceremonial leaders proclaimed that spirit had given her a message that a kettle dance was needed. A kettle dance is a ritual to sacrifice a dog, cook it, and eat it. It is a gruesome and cruel ceremony. When asked what I thought about it, I noted that we all are challenged to determine what spirits are worth listening to and never to forget that even if spirit tells us to do something, regardless of the person imaged by the spirit, we are responsible for our action, and we should do it, only, within our own free will and integrity. Hence, I test, question, and stand my ground regardless of what spirit form shows up. My final determination is what feels correct within me, and I never abdicate my authority to another, in spirit or body, without conscious awareness and discernment.

  4. Sometimes people in these situations have moved from their families to pursue their newly developed spiritual practice. I do not know if this is something that relates to these situations, however, it does seem to be a commonality. In my own case, I was in the middle of a divorce and keeping myself busy with the frequent and long shamanic journeys.

  5. My experience has been that often the person will be living with someone who is not as spiritually attuned. Some of them will have an initial reaction of being very protective of the person and will try to blame you, the shamanic support person, for being mean if you nudge them; or, the person will feel threatened by the energies and will try to get away from what feels like a dark energy. Try not to attach to their reactions as it does not support them or the person you are trying to support. Occasionally, if the caretaker is co-dependent, you will notice that they will do enabling behavior. This shows up as supporting of the spiritual growth of the person you are trying to bring back into their body and attacking you if they feel you are mistreating their partner.

    An Example:
    In one situation, a woman had left her husband and children and was deeply involved in her newly developed spiritual practice. She noted that one or more entities were attacking her and may have pierced or attached to her. When she contacted me, she had medications that she was not taking . I encouraged her to take them and get immediate therapeutic support. Over the course of the next few months, she would ask for support and when she did not get what she wanted, she would go away for awhile. Then, her boyfriend contacted me with deep concern for her well being. He noted that he did not believe in entities and such things, however, he believed that she was quite psychic and had told him about himself in ways that she could not have known otherwise; and, maybe, he added, there is something to these spiritual beings. After some emails and conversation, I suspected that she was about to have an energetic break—spiritual psychosis or the entity was going to take over control. I intentionally provoked her by noting that she was attached to the ecstatic energies and was moving into the dark side to see if she would bow under the nudge, indicating she was close to a break or if she would rear up to attack, a possible indicator of an entity take over. The care-taking boyfriend went into a protective mode and she went into an attack mode of massive judgment and rage. She stopped working with me....a common response...and reestablished herself as a victim to her boyfriend instead of needing to be supported to find the courage or desperation to face the situation and energy. I backed off, realizing that this was forming into a no win triangle.

    The triangulation was not easy to end as she wrote daily emails, sometimes two or three, berating me with statements of my evilness and that she was the person of the light; and, moreover, how dare I insult her with my nudge. It ended with my breaking all psychic connections ritually and blocking her psychic connection and email addresses...I discovered that she had multiple email addresses. I imagine she continues with her shifting back and forth from being light worker and victim.

  6. If it is an extreme case and the person is in some form of terror, such as suicidal or unable to stay fully in the body, total support for the person is imperative. All available support should be used. So the first thing I suggest to the person is to get therapeutic support in case a psychotic break occurs. This will normalize the situation enough for the person to begin to re-ground in the body. If no therapist, preferably shamanic friendly, is available on quick notice, send them to the emergency room. Typically, most hospitals will administer outpatient prescriptions with a referral to a psychiatrist for further evaluation and determination if there is need for long term support. In my case, I realized that I had a profound awareness that I was not sure I had the will to not harm myself. It is a slightly different view on suicide, nonetheless, I was clear that I was not necessarily in control. So, I sought help. A prescription was filled should I need further assistance. Simply having the medication was a form of support as it willed me to stay focused every day till I removed it from the top of my computer screen and threw it out several years later without ever having to take it.

  7. The primary tools for the return to normalcy, whatever that looks like for the person, is to create grounding supports. At least in the short term, all meditation and journey work should discontinue. Exercise, such as walking, especially in nature, cleaning house, using or placing grounding stones in the home, clearing the home or altar from all energies, and focused concentration, even at a spot on the wall will support the person to stay in the body. If medication has been prescribed, this can be supportive.

Over time, the person will learn other ways that they had tuned out and will be able to have a clearer sense of self and more awareness of how to stay fully present whether on a shamanic journey or in day-to-day life.

These are only my experiences with these unusual situations. I do not recommend delving into what is not a comfortable area, nor doing so without medical professionals. Nonetheless, there is much that can be done to bring people back into their bodies.

Another’s Insights

Matthew Powers, a counselor for a nature based program for addictive behaviors in young adults, has had similar experiences. He shared with me some of his insights from the experience in terms of how he faced the situation himself and what can be offered as suggestions to others. He notes:

  1. A large amount of time spent in nature walking barefoot or just sitting next to a tree. In my own experience and working with the addicts out here, nature has a way of creating the homeostasis our body normally operates with. The meditations we do, which alter the brain chemistry and body chemistry, will return to a homeostasis in nature after a certain amount of time given they are not trying to connect to fairies.

  2. Finding a new support group for them to work with. “Spiritual Addicts Anonymous.” The spiritual “norm” of North America is to going out of body. It perpetuates the condition. A spiritual support group in which maintaining grounding and true growth should be recommended by us the practitioners. Know any network of ground communities?

  3. As shamanic practitioners, we could read books on “Addictive thinking” and various other books about addictive behavior to better understand what is happening and how we might support the person. The etheric energies can be just like any other addictive experience.

  4. Gather information about their health care providers and develop a relationship with those who are open-minded. The out of body condition can open the doors for other problematic issues such as sexual addiction, drug use, and violence to oneself and others. More education and working partnerships with the medical community can help prevent further out of body producing health practices.

  5. Working with addicts out here, it appears that the person must experience the rock bottom for out of body psychosis. Without the strong internal desire to change, what they are doing will always appear to them as alright. We have no regulating factor for mediation and spiritual addicts, and probably never will as this falls into the religious categories. In my own case, I never wanted anything I experienced. I just wanted meditations to deal with life and help me become a better person. This desire was always under the surface, and once I got grounded, this desire kicked in. Without that desire, I would still be out there running around. Whatever we call it, “rock bottom”, desire to heal, without this component to build upon, we might as well cut them loose. You are just wasting time for both of you.

Shamanic Support

Much of the above has been about how to support the client to come back into their bodies by fighting the energies/entities, the spiritual psychosis from lack of grounding to the self, or the psychotic break depending on your healing persuasion. In shamanic terms, a recent situation occurred, where I communicated with the person frequently and asked for permission to do shamanic journeys to see how she was doing and to support her in becoming whole. We were using all of the above suggested steps at the same time. In one of the journeys, I noted that she had fragmented and left small pieces of herself that had attached to all of the spiritual realms she had visited. Hence, there was inadequate life force, or soul to fully come home. Having had the same experience, I suggested that she pray daily for all the “lost, forgotten, and misplaced” pieces of her soul to come home to her. These prayers create a homing beam for those lost parts to find their way home. In time, a sense of wholeness begins to occur. In this situation, it is what we are using to support the person to fully come home.

My biggest lesson is that I do not journey to fix the person or to collect the lost parts. I only try to find what is needed to support the person to fully heal their self. In doing so, it empowers the person to heal their self, instead of replacing one form of disempowerment with myself.

Your Thoughts

If you have ideas, thoughts or comments about this topic, please let me know about your experiences.



spewed the
of the purplish-
blue inner space
with perfectly
clear rainbows of
tiny crystals
floating by.

exhaled the
of a brilliant
of Light
wondrous rays
of warmth.

the volcanic
of a cluster
of laser wand
deep from
the heart
of the Light.

the clarity
of each
a brilliant

"Myyyyyy goodness"
savored the
razor sharp lines
of each
face surrounding
the luminous
white Light at the

the crystals
as one began to
then slowly turn
its point downward
towards me
as if inwardly

as the crystals
began to streak
at the speed
of light directly
into me

from the
warmth of
each crystal
further and
further inward
until all
were me.

the attention as
the brilliant
flash of
dimmed to a
small glimmer
then completely
faded away.

3 May 94



A tiny
black dot,
like a period
at the end
of a sentence,
and dances
in my mind.

I look closer
and find that it
is a hole
deep like
endless like

it seems
to call to me
like a piece
of candy
to a child or
a bicycle to
a young boy.

the desire
I look closer
for what joys
might await,
abate, or even
surrogate me
in the darkness.

Leaning forward
I am amused
that it is
no longer a tiny
black hole, but
a giganteus
and wonderfully
mysterious abyss.

I am pulled
into it
as if consumed
by a presence
familiar, oddly

Looking, falling
down, down, down,
and all around,
I see arms flailing
as if trying to touch, or catch, or
maybe possess
some thing.

the arms become
faceless people
black as the night
out, for, to.

my vision,
a silhouette,
much larger,
blacker than
the others,
appears from
the darkness.

Straining to see,
I sense
it is walking
to and from
as if inviting
me to come,
or maybe
to become.

deeper, I see
a luminescent,
golden light
shining, no living,
above its
right shoulder
and head.

the images combine
as a deep, dark
abyss with
some one walking
while lost souls
strain to behold,
maybe to be wholed.

A curious knowing
permeates my
mind, maybe
my soul, that it
is I, blacker than
the night, deeper
than the sea
walking to and from the Light.

28 Aug 94



Frequency 4

The Science

kyaniteKyanite, whose name derives from the Greek word kyanos, meaning blue, is a typically blue silicate mineral, commonly found in aluminum-rich metamorphic pegmatites and/or sedimentary rock. Kyanite is a diagnostic mineral of the Blueschist Facies of metamorphic rocks.

Kyanite is a member of the aluminosilicate series, which includes the polymorph andalusite and the polymorph sillimanite. Kyanite is strongly anisotropic, in that its hardness varies depending on its crystallographic direction. While this is a feature of almost all minerals, in kyanite this anisotropism can be considered an identifying characteristic.

The Spiritual and Healing

It is one of two minerals which never need cleaned or cleared. It will not collect or retain negative energy. It is unlimited energy in application, making it one of the best attunement stones. It aligns all chakras automatically. If directed, it can open all chakras and align all bodies. It brings tranquility and calming to the whole being, especially the throat and ajna (third eye). It stimulates communication and psychic awareness on all levels. It dispels anger and frustration and helps to facilitate clarity with respect to mental awareness and linear reasoning. It induces one to persevere in activities and in situations which would reduce one's strength. It provides a stimulating energy and supports one in the continuation of projects. It further advances the conscious connection between the higher levels of intuition and heart-felt love, producing compassion in both communication and decision-making. It also assists in dispelling confusion arising from emotional, spiritual, and intellectual issues.

It facilitates meditation. It is helpful when accessing the astral plane and when connecting with ones bodies. It helps to induce recall of dreams and to promote dream-solving, providing for access to solutions during the dream state. It balances yin-yang energies, bringing orderly growth to the intellect, emotions, and physical body. It dispels energy blockages in the ethereal plane.

Source: Melody, Love is in the Earth: A Kaleidoscope of Crystals,
Updated, 1995
Blue/gray kyanite connects one with the teachers on higher planes of existence. Black Kyanite enables one to contact or channel beings from the lower astral planes. This refers to people between lives, or devas who have not yet had a lifetime. Green kyanite creates delighted shivers and rushes of well being. Opens one to inspirational busts of truth, love, or healing from higher planes of existence.

Michael’s Gemstone Dictionary

Disthene is also known as kyanite.

Spiritually, kyanite helps us to detach ourselves from a belief in fate and to recognize when and where we have created the causes that have certain effects later on. It also gives us determination.

Emotionally, kyanite leads to a calming effect on the inner world of images and stirred-up emotions. It encourages a pleasant, peaceful nature and liberates us from frustrations and stress.

Mentally, it encourages logical, rational thought and spontaneous action whenever necessary. It encourages conscious self-awareness.

Physically, kyanite fortifies the functions of the cerebellum and of the motor nervous system, thus improving mobility and dexterity.

Michael Gienger, Crystal Power, Crystal Healing.



We will be doing one workshop in Dodgeville, Wisconsin in 2008. We will be doing Cougar/Mountain Lion/Panther Medicine as our fourth and final session of the medicine wheel, April 25-27, 2008. See below and contact Marie Smith at for more details. We will be doing Questing for a Vision July 31 - August 3, 2008 at our farm in Novelty, Ohio. Contact me directly about this program at Some details are below.


Cougar MedicineCougar Medicine
Saying what is so, when it is so without blame or judgement.

April 25-27, 2008

Indigenous cultures refer to medicine as the essence of the person, place or thing. In our terms it is the essence of being a spiritual, physical, mental and emotional being. Cougar or Panther medicine is about the essence of the deep knowing spirit The cougar/panther is the second largest cat in the western hemisphere. It is also one of the fastest and most powerful animals, but it tires quickly. It is powerful enough to kill with its bite or its claws. It can leap over 40 feet.

It is a stealthy hunter, and many of the qualities of the panther hold true for the cougar. If cougar has shown up in your life, it is time to learn about power. Test your own. Most young cougars learn how to use their power through trial and error. It strengthens them and hones their skills. When cougar shows up as totem, much of the trial has been worked through. Now it is time to assert.

People may not like your asserting. They may try and keep you in the category they have always kept you. You can choose to remain so, or you can stretch your muscles and show your capabilities. Those with cougar medicine fall easily under attack, especially by those who have grown comfortable with the status quo and do not wish to truly see you grow. Remember that there will always be some who will not wish to see you come into your own power or will ever acknowledge that you have. If cougar has shown up, there is a choice to be made, and it should be made quickly and strongly. A cougar leaps at its opportunities.

Cougar/Panther Medicine Workshop

The Cougar/Panther Medicine workshop is an initiation-a birthing process to more fully be who you are within the world. The focus is to discover the innate healing presence within yourself that have not been allowed to be seen or heard, let alone to mature as part of who you are. We will nurture those parts so as to begin to create a more centered and balanced life. Our intent is to create the sacred space that will enable you to fully birth who you are, shedding the parts that no longer serve the fullness of your presence. Each person will be given the opportunity to be initiated into the Cougar/Panther medicine.

We will do a mix of ceremony and drum journeys. Contact Marie Smith at for more details.

Sign up or read more about Cougar Medicine on our website.


Questing fo a Vision

July 31 - August 3, 2008

Vision questing was originally known as crying or lamenting for a vision. It involved going into seclusion on a mountain or sacred site without food or water or clothes. Stripped to the nakedness of oneself, the individual sat in total humility waiting for a vision of how the world is different because the individual exists. Questing for a Vision workshop is about learning to listen to who we are more fully as a person.

What to Expect:
We will do a bunch of journeys over the course of the weekend-walking journeys, drum journeys, etc. The focus will be to deepen the awareness of one's internal vision of how to more fully be in the world. The focus of the workshop is immersion into the spiritual world for two and one-half days. A large altar/vortex is created with large rocks and crystals. This creates a massive energetic field. Within this field, the people are able to find the safety necessary for the soul or inner parts of the self to come to the surface to heal and be healed. It is common for people to have life-changing healing experiences.

Who Should Come:
Participants need to be experienced with the shamanic drum journey.

What to Bring:
Please bring any rocks or crystals that want to come along. A journal notebook is encouraged as well as any comforts for sitting on the floor, such as floor chairs, back supports, blankets, pillows, etc.

Sign up or read more about Vision Questing on our website.


Find out more about workshops, retreats, and resources at


This is a shamanic newsletter and is intended only for educational and informational purposes. Any person needing therapeutic support should contact a mental health professional immediately.